The Man I Love Is Afraid Of Wasting My Time
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The Man I Love Is Afraid Of Wasting My Time – What Does That Mean?
Good Morning ma,
I recently came across your blog and I feel you are God sent to me. My name is Nnenna (not real name). I graduated from school last year and God helped me, I got a job in one of the five star hotels here in Lagos. I am a customer service officer.
My job allows me to meet dignitaries from all works of life. That was how I met Sonny (not real name). Sonny is a billionaire. We spoke briefly about 8 months ago. He was impressed by me and asked for my number. We began friends and he asked me to date him.
Now, Sonny is a widower with a 6 year old daughter. His wife died of cancer, a year after she have birth to their daughter. Even though a rich man, he is quiet and very homely person. I like him alot but he him being so rich can be very intimidating.
We dated for a while and that meant I was exposed to his lifestyle of money money everywhere. He was good to me. But we broke up because I met Stan. Stan is a very attractive gym manager that we hired in my hotel 4 months ago. We got talking normally but the chemistry between us is something I didnt expect.
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I never planned to break up with Sonny but he noticed I was talking about this new employee of ours too much and became jealous. He asked me to quit my job and that was when I lost it. I would not be with any man …no matter how rich you are…telling me that I should quit my job.
We argued and eventually broke up. A month later, I started dating Stan. Stan is fun and exciting and treats me really well to be honest. He like me is young and ambitious. Marriage is not in his radar for the next couple of years. He said that to me. That he does not want to waste my time. That marriage for him is a 4 to 5 year plan.
Stan is 27. I am 26. By 4 years…I will be 30 or 31. I want to get married in one or two years. This is the only issue I have with Stan but I love him. He makes me really happy. Recently, Sonny came back to beg me and ask me to keep my job and do whatever I like . That he has not been himself since we broke up.
He has been very nice to me, calling and checking up on me. Stan knows about this and says I should make up my mind if I want to be with Sonny or him. That he will not hold that against me.
And that attitude is my problem. Is Stan trying to wave me off…by encouraging me to choose between him and Sonny? A normal guy should be angry that another man is competing with him over his woman but Stan is seemingly unbothered.
Ma, is that a cue that Stan is not as committed as I am to our relationship? Stan is on a salary. Barely more than mine but I love him for his person. He is sweet and makes me laugh all the time. But waiting for 4 or 5 years…that is something I barely manage to accept.
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The problem I have now is: why will he say things like: I don’t want to waste your time or I should choose between him and Sonny.? Is this normal? Being with Stan…will it be worth it? Will I be wasting my time really? Or maybe this is God’s way of giving me a second chance with Sonny?…
If you were in my shoes, what will you do?
Anonymous
Photo Credit: heatworld
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