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My Husband Left Us For Two Years Without Any Explanation-Should I Continue To Wait?


True Life Story: My Husband Left Us For Two Years Without Any Explanation-Should I Continue To Wait?

Dear Lively Stones,

Today makes it two years that my husband left our home. I am very exhausted and I need advice. I got married to someone who has a very short and hot temper. The marriage of eight years was a horror all through.

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First, my husband was all about having a male child after we have had 3 girls. He kept saying he is the first son in his family and that if I can’t give him a son, he will marry a second wife.

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Just to have a male child, I had to save up to N5M, even borrowed from my elder siblings to do IVF. It was a hard and tough experience for me. My husband was even unwilling to donate his sperm for the procedure until I got his uncle to convince him.

I was finally able to have my son prematurely. He was in ICU for 4 weeks but God saw me through. One would think the male son would end all our issues but it didn’t. My husband was always upset at any slightest opportunity.

Then came the beating.  It started because my 7 year daughter was watching cartoon and he wanted to watch football. So he changed the channel and she was crying. So I told him that he should consider she’s a child and next thing, he beat me cos he said I am not raising my daughter well.

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It was an unhappy experience for me. But I kept praying as everyone was advising. Then one day, I came back from work and discovered my husband has packed his things and left the house. I panicked and called his family and they told me that their son has moved on.

I was confused. Moved on… How? I asked if he wanted a divorce and they did not answer me. I called and discovered my husband had blocked me. My family sent people to his family and they were like I should do whatever I like but if I file for divorce, that they will take my children from me. Some said my husband said he is tired of the marriage. I asked if there is another woman involved, no one answered me.

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Since then, I have been living all by myself. I have no idea where my husband is. I don’t know if he is in the country or not. Rumor has it that he is in Abuja but I don’t know for sure. When my children ask me where their father is, I have no answer for them. I have cried many nights for this wicked husband of mine. Feeding and caring for the children with little help from my family and one of my husband’s best friend…Uncle Tony.

Being a lonely woman has not been easy. Uncle Tony has been asking me to be his woman. He is a divorcee. His wife cheated on him with her boss four years ago. Tony feels the same way as me. Someone betrayed by their spouse. Now, it’s been two years and I want to file for divorce.

Tony has been good to me and I think he will make a good partner cos he understands me very well. Even when my husband was around, he used to wonder why I ended up with such a man. . Last month, I went to get a lawyer to start the divorce proceedings, the lawyer filed and the court sent a copy of the filing to my husband’s family.

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They sent it to him and he called me to say he is sorry and does not want a divorce. He said he will come back so we can discuss. My family is saying I should forget about him cos of how he has treated me. Tony too wants us to move forward.

I know my husband’s has betrayed me but his call has startled me. Even though since that time he has not called back or shown any interest. I don’t know if I should keep hope alive that our marriage might work or just continue with the divorce process.

Please advise me.

Anonymous

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