10 Shocking Habits of People Who Chase Their Friends’ Partners
Many things can bring disappointment in life, but betrayal often sits at the very top of the list.
We can appreciate and admire competition when it inspires growth, but it’s harmful when it undermines someone else’s happiness.
When someone crosses the line by pursuing their friend’s partner, they deserve the consequences that come with such betrayal.
It goes without saying that friendship should be about support, trust, and loyalty.
Friends should uplift one another, share in each other’s joy, and stand by each other during tough times.
But when someone becomes consumed by envy, wanting not just what their friend has but the exact same thing, it crosses a line that shouldn’t be crossed.
These types of people exist everywhere. They sing Avril Lavigne’s song “Girlfriend” with a smile, completely oblivious to the pain they inflict.
They see no wrong in the choices they make, even as they betray those closest to them.
The best thing we can do is keep these kinds of people at a distance.
Habits of Someone Who Chases Their Friend’s Partner
Fortunately, they have certain habits that give them away. Let’s take a closer look at what these habits are.
1. They Make Subtle Moves to Befriend Their Friend’s Partner
Perversion is all about establishing an illicit connection first.
They come up with different ways to get close, whether it’s suggesting double dates, tagging along for activities that clearly don’t require an extra person, or suddenly taking up an interest in something their friend’s partner loves.
Sometimes, the effort seems almost awkward like they’re trying too hard to fit in but the strategy is in the details.
They need to be on their friend’s partner’s radar because you can’t date someone who doesn’t even know you exist.
By creating these opportunities to hang out, they’re planting the seeds for something more personal later on.
2. They Constantly Compare Themselves to Their Friends
To them, everything is a contest, and their friend’s relationship isn’t off-limits.
Whether it’s the way their friend’s partner treats them, the gifts they give, or the way they talk about each other, it becomes a benchmark they obsessively measure themselves against.
Do you know what this is called? Envy in admiration’s clothing!
They see their friend happy, and they want to prove they could make their friend’s partner even happier.
You might hear them say things like, “I could totally do that if I were in your shoes,” but in truth, they’re imagining being in their friend’s shoes with that very partner.
3. They Are Quick to Compliment, but the Compliments Feel Forced
Compliments from this type of friend can be deceiving.
They’ll say things like, “You’re so lucky to have someone like him,” or, “She’s amazing, you really have a keeper,” but underneath that praise is a deeper intention.
It’s almost like they’re trying to remind everyone how great the partner is while also signaling their own appreciation.
They aren’t just celebrating the couple; they’re subtly showcasing that they’re watching closely, and maybe even admiring a bit too much.
These compliments feel rehearsed, as if they’re not just directed at their friend, but meant to let the partner know they’ve caught someone else’s eye.
4. They Dismiss Boundaries as “Overreactions”
When confronted about behavior that crosses the line, like a flirty comment or an inappropriate gesture, they act shocked as if they can’t understand why anyone would take it the wrong way.
They’ll say things like, “Oh come on, I was just being nice!” to brush it off.
By dismissing boundaries as overreactions, they’re trying to keep the door open for themselves.
It’s a way to keep the dynamics ambiguous, to make it harder for their friend to set firm lines while they get closer to the partner.
They twist things so that protecting the friendship seems unreasonable.
5. They Frequently Seek Validation From Their Friend’s Partner
This person craves attention, but specifically from their friend’s partner, the one person they shouldn’t be focusing on.
They want to feel attractive, funny, or desirable, and they want the partner to recognize it.
Maybe they make a joke and wait for the partner to laugh, or they do something helpful and make sure to get a thank-you directly from them.
It’s not about being friendly; it’s about ensuring that the partner sees them as special.
If they can get the partner to admire them, even a little, it’s a step toward creating a connection that goes beyond casual friendship.
6. They Act Differently When Their Friend Isn’t Around
When the friend isn’t around, their whole demeanor changes.
They become more playful, more attentive, or even more flirtatious with the partner.
It’s like they see the friend’s absence as an opportunity, a moment when they can interact more freely.
They make comments like, “You’re so fun to be around,” or find little excuses to stay closer, all without the watchful eyes of their friend.
These moments are calculated. They’re setting up a relationship with the partner that feels more personal, a connection that’s different when no one else is there to see.
7. They Talk About Their Friend’s Relationship Issues as if They’re an Opportunity
They never miss a chance to dive into their friend’s relationship problems.
To the outside world, they look like they’re just being supportive, but their motives are far from pure.
When their friend talks about a fight or a misunderstanding, they lean in with empathy, but there’s an undertone, almost as if they’re glad there’s trouble.
They might say things like, “If it were me, I’d never treat you that way,” hinting at how they’d do better.
It’s not about being a good listener; it’s about putting themselves in the partner’s mind as a potential alternative.
8. They Make Excuses to Stay Involved in Their Friend’s Relationship
This kind of person doesn’t just offer advice; they actively find reasons to insert themselves into the relationship.
If the couple has an argument, they’re there, positioning themselves as the one with the solution.
If there’s a celebration, they’re offering to help plan it, ensuring they’re right in the middle of things.
Their aim is to become indispensable, to create situations where the partner starts relying on them as much as their friend does.
It’s not out of kindness; it’s a strategy to foster closeness with the partner, blurring the lines between friend and something more.
9. They Use Humor to Push Boundaries
Humor becomes their weapon of choice.
They’ll make a joke that’s just a little too flirty or drop an innuendo and then laugh it off, saying, “I’m just kidding!” It’s a clever way to test the waters without outright admitting their intentions.
If the partner laughs or plays along, it emboldens them; if the friend calls them out, they can just deny it.
They use these jokes to gauge how far they can go, seeing if the partner might be receptive to something more while still maintaining a shield of innocence.
It’s all about pushing the boundaries while hiding behind a smile.
10. They Display Selective Loyalty
For these losers, their loyalty is entirely situational.
When everything is going well, they’re the best friend anyone could ask for, but when their friend is struggling in the relationship, they subtly shift their attention.
Suddenly, they’re there for the partner, offering a sympathetic ear and suggesting they deserve better.
They might say things like, “You know, you deserve to be treated right,” with a lingering look that suggests they could be the one to do it.
Their kindness comes with strings attached—it’s only present when it serves their agenda, revealing their intentions to step in and take their friend’s place.
Trust Your Instincts and Protect Your Relationships
Betrayal from those closest to us cuts the deepest when it comes to matters of the heart.
If you recognize any of these habits in someone you call a friend, it’s time to trust your instincts and take action.
You deserve relationships that are built on loyalty, respect, and genuine care, and not one where someone is trying to undermine your happiness for their own gain.
Though many unexpected things happen these days in the world of dating and marriage, some lines should never be crossed.
Those who are willing to do the unconventional like pursuing their friend’s partner, should rather find someone who matches their values instead of disrupting someone else’s happiness.
Don’t let them make you question your instincts. Act now, set boundaries, and distance yourself. You are worthy of friendships that uplift, not tear down.
