We Broke Up Because Of Our Genotype Yet Fate Keeps Punishing Us
True Life Story: We Broke Up Because Of Our Genotype Yet Fate Keeps Punishing Us
Dear Lively Stones,
I have a story on genotype. Please before you claim genotype, please do your test very very well…..Ade was the love of my life. I never been so much in love…a guy who worshipped me with love…he was everything. We dated for eight months and spent everyday with each other. My parents loved him and could not ask for a better future son in-law. We were both looking forward to a future today until one day my dad asked Ade what his genotype was. Ade did not know so my dad asked him to go do it. After testing, it turned out that Ade is AS and I am also AS.
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That was the beginning of the end. My parents who are both lecturers in school of medicine advised us to break up cos there was no future being married to someone who has the sickle cell gene. It was rough but my father pushed Ade away, he warned him not to make his only daughter a sad woman. You see, I am an only child. My parents lost 2 children to the sickle cell. Before that, my mom has several miscarriages, my survival was nothing short of a miracle.
So even though it crushed us, me and Ade broke up. I moved on to Study in the US, I met and got married to my husband who has the good gene, AA…we have a son. Three years later, we got divorced due to infidelity from my husband. It was quite a painful one because he slept with several women, too much for me to bear. I decided to move back home and start afresh. But starting afresh has not been easy cos I think I still have trust issues for men. So, have dated casually here and there but nothing really serious.
I started trying online dating and I searched Ade online. I saw that he was married and decided to stay away from him until he sent me a friend request months back. I accepted and we got talking. He was very empathetic that I was divorced. He started trying to hook me up with some of his friends, Ted, one of his friends and I started dating.
Ted, is Ade’s business partner, a nice guy…we been going strong and got engaged. But then the strangest thing happened…. Ade was involved in a minor accident recently and he was required to run some tests. During the test, they discovered he was actually AA and not AS. He refused to believe it so he ran the test in 3 other labs. It turns out that Ade was actually given a wrong genotype many years ago….he is actually AA. This revelations came with mixed feelings cos we realize now that wrong diagnosis have changed our lives forever.
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The day Ade came to my place to tell me the news….I curled up on the floor and began to cry. Like….I wailed for almost 20mins. Ade too cried….like we were both robbed of ever being together. Now, he has a wife and children….it was a vulnerable moment….we ended up sleeping with each other. And we both felt bad to be cheating on our partners. My feelings for Ade is all back and stronger. The same for him. We don’t know what to do about it.
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And yes, I am planning my wedding with Ted but all my thoughts and feelings are with Ade. How do I marry Ted after sleeping with his friend…same friend who introduced us? Why is this life so unfair? How do I marry Ted when I am in love with Ade? This is not fair…not fair…..please advise me….or is this a sign that Ade and I may have been given a second chance or how else can anyone explain what is happening right now? How do I get Ade out of my head when the only obstacle in our way just cleared away?
Anonymous
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