This So Called Friendship Is Threatening Our Marriage-Please Advice

November 1, 2021 Stan

This So Called Friendship Is Threatening Our Marriage-Please Advice

Good day. I have a couple in need of help, may you share their story ,publish and share advices from different neutral people.

The story goes like:
Mike and Marry are a couple blessed with two kids a girl(11) and a boy (10). They lived a happy life ever since they got married. Mike knew he was a pastor before getting married and did not hide from Marry who agreed to that condition before marriage.

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It happened that life was good for the first years in the ministry, but later on things started to be difficulty. A couple sat down and decided that one should go look for a job to help with cost of living which is rising daily.

Marry got a job in a resort some 150 kms from home and she should be staying there for 22 days coming home for 7 days. Mike could also visit her at her work place since she had her own room.

Life became bitter when Mike received an anonymous sms stating the change of behaviour of his wife. In the message was a part that actual reads”open your eyes your wife is in love with John the reception manager”. Marry had previously mentioned to Mike about friendship with John who ran a business in another town.

Wanting her to be a partner on another project that would involve her travelling to that town for business etc. After Mike receiving the SMS,he visited the wife surprisingly, but the manager didn’t allow him in because of the hotel rules.

Normal she would have booked 24 hours before arrival of Mike. She then knew around 10 PM that Mike was at the gate she went received him in. Mike asked for her phone which she had deleted every conversations and calls she does with John.

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The confusion started from there,Mike showed him the SMS he received and Marry said,” nothing like that is happening, we are just friends and colleagues, but at once he just proposed and l refused”,but the friendship was so close to a point of Marry visiting John to his room which was some kms from hers.

When John is going home,he was comfortable leaving his room keys to Marry. Some days after Mike receives a phone call from John’s wife saying,” are you aware your wife is seeing my husband, l saw a lot of messages, phone calls etc. This last weekend she sent a good morning love” .

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From January to date Marry still calls John a friend. Since then Mike told her to cut that relationship because it was not doing good for him, but Marry is not willing to do so. So Marry and Mike have been fighting over this issue for months now, Marry insists on her friendship to John to a point that even last month Mike caught Marry talking on the phone to John during her off days while she was in the car.

Mike from January is avoiding a divorce for the sake of the kids, they spoke about the issue and Marry is comfortable on separation than terminating the friendship relationship with John.

Is this a normal friendship? Would like to hear different ideas from both s*xes in an issue like this. Mike could have stopped Marry from working, but he said he did not for two reasons:

1)Believing his wife was telling the truth that it was just people gossiping
2) He wanted time to reveal the truth.

Now he is thinking of filling for a divorce. Marry is agreeing on that option, but what of the innocent kids, should they grow in a broken family because mama chose a friend over them?

Please advice

Anonymous

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