Please Help Me-My Husband Is Leaving Me & I Am Freaking Out
True Life Story: Please Help Me-My Husband Is Leaving Me & I Am Freaking Out
Dear Lively Stones,
I need your advice, my worst fear has been confirmed and I am very scared and confused. My husband is leaving me and my seven month old child. So, I met my husband three years ago. He had just come out of a very bad divorce. His wife cheated on him and left him with their two kids to America. He was in a very low place, we became friends and I helped him get back on his feet. I helped him get a job where his boss really liked him. Under a few months, he was given a new car and good salary.
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We eventually got married a year later and God blessed us with a baby girl. Sometime last year, my husband started telling me that he wants to japka cos he is making decent money to sponsor his jakpa project. I was happy for him but it was only recently that I found out that my husband and his ex are in talking terms. She is actually the one inviting him over to America.
I found out during Christmas because the ex came and they met in her hotel. My husband slept with her and they made up. Can you imagine? Now, the woman is claiming to be pregnant for him and wants them to be a family again. It was my husband’s younger sister that likes me alot that revealed all these to me. I confronted my husband and he started apologizing, saying he wants his children in his life so that is why he agreed to go back to his wife.
Why is this man treating me like this? What have I done to deserve this? After I picked him up and brushed him up after his wife cheated on him, sold their properties and ran away? Now, he is going back to her? Men!!…please any woman dating a divorced, please be very careful because men can stain your white.
Then I asked my husband,what about me? What about our daughter? He then said, I can still remain his wife but I would be his second wife back in Naija. He would send regular upkeep money and visit us as much as he can. To be honest, I feel already disappointed in my husband going back to his first wife and then he is suggesting a become a second wife is really a disgusting suggestion. But my family is saying I should accept to be his second wife and naija wife so that my child or even myself can have opportunity to relocate to America one day.
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I am feeling so sad and unhappy and confused and betrayed…..I can look after my baby and myself but I still love my husband….even with the betrayal…what should I do please? Should I divorce him or stay in naija as his second wife? What will I tell my child as she grows? what will I say., that her father has another family abroad? What will I do when I get lonely? Yes, in future, there may be opportunities to japka but is that not if this man does not even forget all about us once he joins his family?
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My husband is leaving by month end…I need to give him an answer. Please advise me, my heart is completely broken. I need to think straight. I need to think what is best for me and my child. And again, how is it that I am going to be second wife? He legally divorced the ex…does that not make me the first wife now and she, the second wife? I need sound advice.
Anonymous
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