My Baby Daddy’s Wife Wants To Raise Our Daughter But See Why I Am Afraid

True Life Story: My Baby Daddy’s Wife Wants To Raise Our Daughter But See Why I Am Afraid

Dear Lively Stones,

My four year old daughter’s father is married to another woman and he wants custody of our daughter so that his wife be a part of our daughter’s life. You see, I was once friends with my baby daddy’s wife five years ago. We became friends because she used to come to my salon to make her hair. I noticed that she seemed to like to come with her husband and she was really friendly with me. When she came, her husband would order food for her and buy for me too. I just thought they were a very nice couple.

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However, it didn’t take me long to notice that the husband was actually hitting on me. My shock was that, the woman did not seem to mind cos he started calling me, his girlfriend after a while, even in front of her. I was a 37 year old single lady and I was intrigued how this guy was showering me with attention and his wife was oblivious. But because she was nice to me, I had to talk to her. I showed her text messages of her husband trying to sleep with me.

This lady did not act surprised. She then told me that she knows her husband likes me and she has no objection if I like him too. I was like, how, why…why will she not object. She then said because she cannot have children for him and he wants a baby. That they have tried everything medically but she cannot have children. So, she supports anything he wants to do to have children.

To me, I felt sorry for her but she said I should not feel sorry for her that she likes me too and if I like, I can have a baby for her husband and she would like to be my baby’s step mother…she promised to make sure the child will be well provided for. I took some time to think about this and finally I agreed. So, I sent her a message that its ok. So, she started inviting me to her house and when I come, she would excuse me and her husband or invite me to their guest room and we would have s3x.

After the first time, we arranged for a second time especially during my ovulation period. When the time came, I was at their house and this time, instead of just the husband sleeping with me, this woman joined and I was like, what is going on here;they wanted to have a threesome with me. Instantly, I rejected and I was like, I cannot do this. I agree to have a baby for your husband but not a threesome with both of you. It led to an argument. The woman said she must be part of it so she can feel like she was part of making the baby. That sounded weird to me, almost like….felt like a ritual.

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To me, I tried to continue but I felt uncomfortable and I eventually left in annoyance cos she insisted on being part of our s3x. When I said no, she said she cannot trust me if I do not let her join her husband and me. I said ok…deal is off. She said fine. But after a few weeks, the husband reached out to me and apologized and said we can continue without the wife. I then said, in that case, I cannot come to their house but to my house. He agreed but he lied that the wife also agreed. So, we continued sleeping together but his wife was not aware. I got to find out that the wife was not aware after I got pregnant. The wife felt betrayed. She sent me alot of insults and abuse and warned me to abort the child cos we did it behind her back.

Of course, I refused. She then said if I have that child for her husband, she will make sure I regret it for the rest of my life. The husband really wanted the child but to please the wife, he said I must agree to anything his wife has said. I told him I will not abort. So for many months, he did not speak to me until the 7th month of my pregnancy. He sent me money and asked me to tell him if I needed anything. Eventually, I had my baby but this did not make the woman accept the baby. She said I does not want anything to do with my child but that she has forgiven me. So, I have been raising my daughter with her father coming to see her regularly and sending us money.

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I later found out that the lady adopted a son a year later. Everything has been going well, I am minding my business but my baby daddy told me that his wife has changed her mind about my daughter and wants her to come live with them with their adopted son, so the children can grow up under the same roof as brother and sister. The issue now is, I have grown fond of my daughter that I do not want another woman to raise her. So, I told him no, that I don’t want that anymore.

This annoyed him cos he said that was the agreement from beginning and that if I refuse, he would drag me to court and get full or joint custody of our daughter. I have spoken to a lawyer who said the court can actually give him custody depending on how the story gets out that I initially agreed to have a baby for him and his wife. There is no legal paper but I was recorded when I agreed and they also have text messages where I said I have agreed.

I need advice because I do not want to let go of my daughter and I also don’t want that woman around her cos she feels bitter about me, that I went behind her back to sleep with her husband but truthfully, its not my fault. I only continued cos the husband lied that she agreed. So, now, I feel she might even still be upset and may harm my daughter if she goes to live with them. This whole thing is a mess but I just want to keep raising my daughter by myself.

What should I do please? I thought about joint custody but I still have concerns about the woman with my child in their house. Do you think she could hurt my child or do you think she would not? This man has been good to me and my daughter…he provides for her like any responsible father would do…but I know he loves his wife and is afraid of her cos when I tried to seduce him after our baby was born, he rejected all my advances…he said he cannot do anything his wife does not approve of…after she found out he lied to her.

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I just feel uncomfortable around the woman. What kind of woman has such a husband? Anything she says, he does it. Wife wey organize threesome for her husband…ha…Yes, he lied to her but then he was desperate…now…him dey fear her wella….me too…am afraid….Am I being too paranoid or what? Remember she once said if I had this baby, that I would regret it… If you were in my shoes…what would you do…should I run away with my daughter or can I trust her with that woman?

Anonymous

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