Michelle Collins, 62, reveals the heartbreaking reason her husband Mike Davidson, 40,  proposed after detailing how it took her decades to find love

Michelle Collins has revealed the heartbreaking reason her husband proposed to her after detailing how it took her decades to find true love.

The EastEnders actress, 62, tied the knot with Mike Davidson two years ago and the star admitted she was shocked by the proposal, which came out-of-the-blue a decade after the couple met.

But Michelle, who is best known as Cindy Beale in the BBC One show, has revealed onTuesday that her now husband originally popped the question in order to make her feel safe following the death of her mother.

The soap star‘s mother Mary passed away after a battle with cancer three years ago and Michelle said at the time that she was ‘devastated’ after the loss of the ‘kindest woman I knew’.

Michelle met Mike, 40, just before her 50th birthday and the couple got married three months after she turned 60.

Speaking on Kaye Adams‘ podcast How to be 60, the actress said: ‘I’ve been engaged a few times, but I never thought I would ever get married and actually he also said he would never get married. I said: “so why did you suddenly decide? Why did you ask me?” I was intrigued.

‘He said: “because with your mum gone, I knew how much she meant to you and I felt I wanted to make you feel safe and look after you.” It’s such a beautiful lovely thing to say. And I suppose I do feel safe.’

The couple recently celebrated their second wedding anniversary and Michelle described her husband as the ying to her yang.

She said:  ‘It’s a case of somebody I can do nothing with. I can just be me and not worry that he thinks I’m boring, or that I think he’s boring. Somebody to be bored with and to do nothing with. I think that is a true partner.

‘We are very different people. But I think it’s the yin and the yang and that’s what makes us tick. He’s very supportive, he’s not in the same industry, which is really great. He’s kind of normal, but can you be normal married to me! You’ve got to be a very tolerant person. 

‘I feel very lucky.’ she added. 

The star also discussed here struggled to find love, revealing on the podcast: ‘I just seem to be one of these people who it’s taken me a long time to find myself. I was maybe looking in the wrong places, looking for the wrong people.’ 

Michelle previously revealed in an interview with Prima magazine that she ‘never thought’ she’d find love in her 50s but was first told by a psychic she’d meet ‘the love of her life’ as she neared her 50th birthday.

The star went on to meet her husband Mike Davidson just months later.

Michelle joined EastEnders in 1988 and became a firm favourite as the unfaithful wife of long-suffering Ian Beale but he told Kaye Adams that the fame took its toll on her private life.

The actress left EastEnders in 1998 and went on to star in a host of hit TV dramas, including Two Thousand Acres of Sky and Sunburn, as well as spending three years as Rovers Return landlady Stella Price in rival soap Coronation Street.

But she returned to Eastenders when it was revealed that Cindy hadn’t actually died in childbirth, but had entered a witness protection programme under a new name.

Despite her successful career, Michelle admitted she has struggled in her personal life.

She said: ‘Can you have a wonderful personal life and a wonderful career? I really don’t know if that is achievable. My life was a bit dramatic I suppose. I had a complicated love life. I worked a lot, but my personal life wasn’t always great. I probably never met the right man in my life and I was a very strong woman.’

Michelle, who has a daughter Maia, 28, from her previous relationship with Fabrizio Tassalini, added: ‘Maybe it just took me a long time to grow up. I’m a very emotional person, I’m very much an open book. Sometimes I should have been more guarded in my life.

Michelle’s er ex-partner Fabrizio died in 2014 after a battle with liver cancer and following his death the actress said she was heartbroken.

She told The Mirror: ‘I remember swallowing some pills. There was no definite plan or explicit ­decision behind my actions. It just happened.’ 

But the star recovered and has found love once more with her husband of two years, Mike. 

She also revealed that she is happier than ever in her 60s.  

Michelle said: ‘I actually think I feel better now at 60 than when I was 50,’ she explained. ‘I’m always careful about saying: “oh, I’m really happy and really content,” because there’s always something that rocks your boat – you don’t ever want to sound too smug.

‘I don’t want to be one of those people that are going: ‘oh, isn’t my life wonderful, I’ve just found the man of my dreams,’ and the next thing you read they’ve broken up. I’m a bit of a cynic in that sense.

‘But I’m loving my life. There was far more drama in my life when I was in my late 40s/50s, I was in a very different place. I know myself a lot better now. I think I’m a lot more comfortable in my skin and I feel a bit like – well, if people don’t like me that’s fine. I don’t like everybody anyway!’

Despite Cindy being one of EastEnders’ most popular characters, Michelle admits that she can’t bear to watch herself on screen.

‘A lot of people put those old scenes up and when I see them, I think: ‘oh my God!’ I don’t like watching myself at the best of times and I can’t watch it now either,’ she said.

‘I think: ‘God that voice, I sound awful.’ And how did I ever say those lines? It just feels like it was a completely different person.’

She also said that she has no plans to slow down. ‘People say to me: ‘Michelle, do you ever stop?’ And I go: ‘yeah, well when I stop, I die.’ Life’s too short. I feel I have so much still to give in my life. I’m still very ambitious. A lot of people wind down, or are expected to wind down. I’ll never retire, because I love what I do.’