Pls Help- I Ended The Affair But My Desires Still Refused To Go Away

February 28, 2024 Stan

True Life Story: Pls Help- I Ended The Affair But My Desires Still Refused To Go Away

Hi Lively Stones,

I need your advise. I had an affair with a married friend but I tried to end it yet, I still have desires. So, I have this school friend, we meet in year two back in Uni. Let’s call her Osas. She transferred from another department to mine and she was struggling and she became close to me so I could help her with her catching up in class. We became very good friends. Osas spent alot of time sleeping in my room with me cos we study alot. Osas family also lived in Benin so most times, during the weekend, she would go home to see her family and bring lots of goodies.

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Sometimes, I went with her to her family house during the weekends and her parents were really very nice to me. When we got to 300 level, Osas elder brother that was in UNN graduated and was at home waiting for his NYSC, so we used to gist during those weekend visits to their house. After a while, I noticed their mother’s attitude changed towards me anytime, Osas brother was talking to me.

I had no idea the brother liked me cos he never said anything to me. Besides, I took them like family so it never crossed my mind but the mother’s attitude got worse that she told me to stop coming to their house. Well, I felt hurt but I stayed away. Me and Osas relationship continued but not as close anymore. We finally graduated and left school. We did not keep in touch much until like four years later, I heard that Osas brother was married, I saw his wedding pictures with his wife and their babies on Facebook.

One day, the brother sent me a friend request and I accepted. We got talking at the time, I was just coming out of a very bad relationship. Without planning it, me and Edward became very close through chatting and we also got too personal and he told me he actually was in love with me when we were in school and his mother found out his feelings by reading his diary that he had feelings for me. I could not believe it. One thing led to another, Eddy and I started seeing each other.

Yes, we both knew he was married but it felt like, he was happier with me than his wife. We both felt that his mother deprived us of an opportunity for us to find each other earlier. We both felt guilty that we were cheating but we could not stay away from each other. Eventually, Osas found out about me and her brother and she called me to chat. Osas was married too. Osas then said something very weird: she said she does not blame her brother for falling in love with me cos she too was in love with me.

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I laughed and said I loved her too but Osas was serious. She said, she had lesbian thoughts about me. I was like eh…what? Me? I was like, well, that is crazy but am not a lesbo. Osas said because of my good nature and cos I am very pretty, its very easy for people to fall in love with me. She says she thinks her brother is hooked on me cos of that but that I should leave him to work on his marriage.

After much thought about this, I decided to break up with Eddy. Eddy did not find it funny. He begged and cried but I was done. I felt he was just having boyhood fantasies for me. For several months, he was still sending me messages on Facebook but I blocked him. Since then, I have moved on and gotten married with a son. But in my heart, I feel like I don’t love my husband the way I love Eddy. My heart is still with Eddy. Infact, I have dreams of Eddy even when making love with my own husband.

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I compare my husband with Eddy in everything, my husband is not romantic like Eddy. Eddy can send you 50 love messages in a day, always calling, always asking how I am feeling, always kissing and always horny to have me. My husband is a complete opposite. He only says I love you once in a year or twice. He is always busy and has no time for my feelings. He provides for me and my son but I make my own money too so its not like money is my need. I wish I have a sensual man like Eddy. I married my husband cos he was the first guy to ask me out after I broke up with Eddy. I needed someone to help me forget Eddy but Eddy is unforgettable.

Osas called me about five weeks ago. At first, it sounded like we were just catching on but later she said the real reason she called was because she wanted to apologize for discouraging me and Eddy. She said she was jealous of our affair cos she also had feelings for me but that her brother has never been the same since we broke up and he has finally separated from his wife. That the brother is blaming his mother for pushing away the love of his life which is me. That Eddy is living very dangerously by sleeping with different women everyday….that he says he does not believe in love anymore since he was not allowed to be with the only woman he loved.